Sunday, June 30, 2013
Amos and Puck
As a young boy growing up in suburbia Kentucky in the mid-west you are pretty much in conflict over yourself from the moment you hit puberty. Am I a momma's boy or dad's boy? Am I a Wildcat's fan or a Card's fan? But this story isn't so much about where I was brought up, rather what my surrounding were. For most children you have a simple revelation at an early age that will grow and define you for the rest of your life. Are you a dog lover or a cat lover.
Some of my friends had both dogs and cats, and therefor they got the best of both worlds. The companionship of a dog through thick and thin following you, sometimes leading you through the woods off on some unknown adventure. And the mystery of a cat, often perched high atop the refrigerator scoping out the scene trying to find just the right opportunity to sneak down, avoiding the family dog, to brush up against your hand hanging off the side of the couch and slowly maneuver it's body into your lap only to find you petting it continuously for hours while you caught up on a rerun marathon of Alf.
For myself however it wasn't quite that simple. From a very young age I was exposed to dogs only and when you are 5 or 6 years old you don't really think much of this. My Gamma would tell me stories of her childhood dog friend, who would travel with her to school. Would wait outside the schoolhouse for her to get out of school and then walk her back home in the afternoon. She continued of this childhood dog getting stuck with her in the snow and always finding her when she needed guidance as a child. These romanticized stories at such an early age would be held dear to me even to this day. The thought of being a dog lover still wasn't at issue and I just went about my own childhood with my 2 best friends. In my case it was Brooke and Toddles. Both dogs were of course the beloved family pets to a very normal, run of the mile, suburb household. Brooke was a mutt of no distinction other than she loved to growl and get into fights with other dogs and sometimes humans. Toddles was a beautiful long coated collie that had the heart of gold. She would follow you around the house through thick and thin. Toddles was the type of dog that would be the first person to go into your pillow fort made up of every pillow in the house, that you spent an hour or so setting up to make it just right to play with you and laugh with you. And she would also be the first dog to arrive on the scene in that same pillow fort when you were crying your eyes out from whatever had caused you to start crying in the first place.
Much like any child of 5 or 6 having two amazing dogs to run around with and explore with there was not enough time in the day to ponder, am I a dog person or a cat person? The question had to come much later in life, despite the fact that mom and dad were both very much dog lovers. At the age of 9 it was determined, as had been determined in my father many years to my junior, that I was also highly allergic to cats. And again, as a kid, these sort of questions don't really come to mean much of anything. I had already decided at a young age that I loved dogs. I never had any idea that my fathers allergies and now my allergies had pigeonholed me into becoming a dog lover. As a child, one just never puts much thought into these sorts of things.
Man did my life ever take a child related turn when i was indeed highly allergic to cats. To be honest up until the age of 9 I had never even spent a single moment around cats. Had never taken the time to pet them, had never enjoyed there soothing prrrrr as they settle in next to you. Cats to me were very alien and much the reason why the topic becomes such a polarizing issue. Some people just aren't meant to be around cats, they are unapproachable, quiet, withdrawn, and moody all characteristics dog lovers would tell you why they would never own a cat. And much the same, the dog is very needy and compulsive and dependent and that too are valid reasons why cat lovers never entertain the idea of owning a cat.
For most people this isn't even a topic and the thought of even putting it into words is a silly conversation. For the simple fact that cat lovers and dog lovers don't even think twice about who they are. Most people, except my best friend Jon. Jon wasn't much of a dog or cat lover, but just that his family had both. As a young kid going over to his house was much a hassle, but you don't just stop going over to your best friends house! Not going over to your best friends house at the age of 11 is like committing suicide on said friendship. That friendship just meant that i would have to be aware of the surroundings i was going into. And many of days and nights were spent with scratchy throats, watery eyes, itchy eyes so bad you want to claw at them, stuffy noses, tiny little hairs stuck in your nose you want to pick your nose for hours just trying to get at that one hair stuck to the inside of your nose. It really was that bad.
And that would be the end of the story. My life would have continued as normal as a dog lover, obviously. Growing up and on into adulthood i have had no additional interaction with cats. Infact, I have spent most of my adult life avoiding cats, constantly washing my hands when around cats, intentionally not touching the cat. And actively going to friends houses for super bowl parties and the like in full fear of encountering a cat.
My life was full of dogs in every aspect. And much like my mom and her mom, when the time finally came I got 2 adorable and amazing dogs of my own, Maggie and Rufus and my life was complete. Or so I thought.
You see life has a way of introducing to you obstacles that you don't really for see coming. Minor issues of course, that really have no need to develope. I had dated woman from time to time and always said in the back of my head "look out for those cat-loving woman". And it wasn't a concrete thought, but was at least a fore thought. What was never really thought about was that middle range of person. The type of person that my best friend Jon was, that was really on the fence. Not as much a dog or cat lover, but more just an animal lover in general.
In the summer of 2012 on a warm and relaxing night you could feel the cool air blowing in off the ocean. A typical southern California night, much the same that you would encounter on any night. And as i walked into the Covell wine bar on Vermont street not much was thought about as to if i was a dog lover or any silly notion like that. One just cannot and does not think about these things as you are walking into meet a girl for the first time. We talked for hours in that wine bar and when the night had run it's course I asked her if she wanted to head to the beach to further continue our amazing night. So we went down to the beach and set up a quiet little picnic blanket under the boardwalk on the Santa Monica pier. And over the next hour we just lay there and enjoyed the waves crashing in and that cool, relaxing ocean breeze driven California night.
I would say it was at least 2 or 3 weeks before i finally had the chance to make it over to her place. And in that time frame my mind had nothing to do with the fact that i was highly allergic to cats. So in I walk into her apartment and bam. Though she had told me she actually had 2 cats within the first few hours of meeting her, who really puts any thought into THAT when you are meeting an amazing woman for the first time?
And so my mind drifted, over months and many days I now had to come to grips with this. Does a relationship come to an end over some cats? How do you deal with being allergic to cats and now you are spending all your time, literally 24/7, with a girl that has loved and cared for and can't be separated from her 2 cats, Puck and Amos.
Days went on and on and slowly, eventually I found myself coming to the conclusion, I was fucking screwed. She's not going to pick me over her cats, nor should she have too as I am as much a lover of animals as she is. I understand the bond one has for their pets and how much they bring joy and happiness into ones life.
As Megan and I depart on what will be the next defining chapter of our life I have really come to love those cats. She may not even know it yet, but I personally have already vowed and written the next, unknown paragraph of this story. I am ecstatic to unleash my love for her and share it with those 2 cats. Never before had I even considered I would move in with a girl that had 2 cats, but it is going to happen. And it is going to work. Though with some separation from the cats, the idea of living with the cats has completely left my mind and because of my love for this woman I am ready to take on the responsibility of caring for something that I never cared for before. And that to me is the most exciting thing that has ever happened to me. The fact that 1 woman has shown me that love has no boundaries, I feel unleashed, and ready to love whatever comes my way.
Matthew
6-20-13
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